(Bare)back to reality

Steph and I are laying on the couch, our bodies still dripping wet from the hot tub.

"What's wrong," Stephanie asks. "You look like you saw a ghost!"

"I... I can't believe I didn't use a condom!"

I have no idea how I spaced that badly. The only explanation I can think of is that I was so into what was happening that I just totally forgot. I had gone to a place I had not been in a very long time. I let my guard down.

"You are so funny with those condoms," she says. "You're always fumbling around trying to pull them off so you can spoo all over me." Yeah, "spoo" is her cute little word for "cum". Sometimes we'll be going at it hot and heavy, and she'll whisper, "Are you gonna spoo all over me, baby?"

"You pulled out, Steve," she says. "way before you came."

"But that's not-"

"And I AM on the pill."

"I know."

"You said you use condoms every single time. Right?"

"Yeah! That's why I can't believe I did that."

"Remember when I said I believe you and I trust you?"

"Yeah."

"I meant it. I believe that you've been really safe. So we can go without every once in a while if you want."

"Why don't we get tested together, and then we can go without every time?"

"We'll get tested together, but barebacking every time? Uh-uh. Only when I'm not fertile. I don't wanna tempt fate."

**********

Monday, December 6.

Mary from HR stands ominously in my doorway. What the hell does she want NOW?

"Yes ma'am," I say, looking up from what I was doing.

"Did Landon threaten you?" she demands.

"Uh, yeah, he might have said something."

"Did he say, 'You're gonna regret this'?"

"Yes."

"Steve!" she shrieks. "Why didn't you TELL me this earlier? We have to call the police!"

"Mary, drop it!"

"No, Steve, no! If for no other reason, do it for your own personal safety. What if he comes after you?"

"If he comes after me, I'll take care of myself."

"Steve, I HIGHLY recommend we file a police report."

I sigh. Jesus fucking Christ. I do NOT have time for this bullshit.

"Fine, fine. Call them."

**********

Wednesday, December 8.

The police were very concerned about Landon's comment, and about his breaking the pen holder. The chief of police himself went to speak to him.

Looks like Mary was right after all.

The police chief claims that Landon was very apologetic, professional and courteous, and that Landon is going to contact me. I'll believe that when I see it.

Sure enough, at 10:30, my phone rings.

"Steve, this is Landon."

"Hi, Landon."

"Steve, I owe you an apology. You and your staff. I was disrespectful and rude."

"Thanks for saying that, Landon."

"And I know you don't know me as well as some people, but I think you're aware that I'm not the type of person who would go around... seeking revenge, or something. I mean, I... I guess I deserved a lot of that."

I can't decide of Landon is being sincere, or if he's just saying what he has to to get out of trouble. I actually think he means it. If he thought he was right, there's no way he would have given in.

A couple of days later, I get a nice note from Landon, saying basically the same things.

After reviewing Landon's duties with our IT department, I have decided that he didn't even have enough work to justify hiring a replacement.