Thursday, February 24, 2005

Tea Tim for two

Friday, February 18, 10:45am
Steve's office

Dom is standing in my doorway.

"Does Steph have study group tonight?"

"Of course!"

"Come out with me and Tim tonight. She keeps bugging me to introduce you."

"Where are you going?"


"That's way downtown. Are you driving?"

"We are, yeah."

"I think I'll take the train. What time should I be there?"

"You know, 9:00, 9:30, whatever."


Suede (a downtown bar)

I'm dressed in sharply-creased black pants and a silk button-down shirt, with a long black overcoat.

The bar is big and roomy, with shiny tiled floors and 20-foot ceilings with spotlights pointing everywhere. I can hear the dim thud of dance music from a floor above us.

Dom is standing at the bar with his back to me; I walk towards him. I am almost there when a short, beautiful blonde steps in front of me.


I nod.

"STEEEEEEEEEVE!" she shreiks, and proceeds to hug me. It's a full-body hug: Thighs against thighs, stomach against stomach, shoulders against shoulders. Her tits press against my chest, thick and plump and BIG. I am instantly hard.

I am overwhelmed by the heavy, sexy scent of perfume; Tommy Girl, I think. I put my hands around her waist; her skin is soft and supple, her back taut and toned. I like the idea that my arms go almost all the way around her body, as if I could pick her up and carry her away.

"It's so great to finally MEET you!" She pulls back, looking up at me. I take a good look at her, and I'm suddenly short of breath.

The words most beautiful girl I have ever seen involuntarily cross my mind, like a slogan that flashes on the TV screen as I channel surf. She is truly gorgeous: Her hair is long and thick, and well past her shoulders; her eyes are big and round and the color of... denim, beset by impossibly long lashes. Her smile is wide and happy, exposing two rows of flawless teeth.

This girl is not human. She's too perfect. She's a cartoon, a picture drawn by a horny 15-year-old boy in the back row of anatomy class. Her hair looks like a shampoo ad; her skin like a Noxema ad; her teeth like a toothpaste ad.

"Nice to... meet you," I manage, staring at her.

"Sit down!" She guides me by the wrist to a bar stool, then spreads my legs apart and bumps her curvy hips between them and against the seat. She's wearing tight black pants and a midriff-exposing shirt which dangles droolingly, far in front of her abdomen.

Dom comes back with the drinks. He smiles, and without a word he places a vodka and tonic in front of me.

"I would introduce you, but it looks like you two already know each other."

"Why didn't you tell me he was so CUTE?" Tim says.

"Ah boy, here we go," Dom says, rolling his eyes. "I told you how he is with the ladies."

She picks up the toothpick from her martini and gently grabs the olive with her teeth. As she slides the toothpick back out, it slips from her hand and lands right in her cleavage.

All eyes go to her breasts. Without skipping a beat, she reaches down and grabs the toothpick and puts it back into her glass. "It's ok, they're real. They won't deflate," she says. Dom and I burst out laughing.

"You told me how he WAS with the girls," Tim says, staring at me. "Now he's got a ball and chain!"

"I have to tell you, I am really happy to have a ball and chain like her."

"I think that is SO hot," she says, rolling her eyes.

"What is?"

"That you're so capable of commitment."

"Why? You don't want a boyfriend," Dom says.

"That doesn't mean I can't admire Steve!" She leans in closer, tilting her chin up at me. For a crazy moment, I think she's going to kiss me.

"I think Dom is jealous of you," she whispers. A puff of her breath hits my face, clean and hot.

"Tim, come on! Don't be silly!"

"He sees how happy you are, and I think he wants that for himself. You're actually a good influence on him!"

"I doubt it."

"He talks about you a lot. I feel like I know you."


"MM-hmmm," she nods.

I look over at Dom. He's talking to another blonde.

Dom is no slouch. I can't imagine him getting jealous over Tim talking to me, or over anything. He's way too cool for that. The most he'll do is what he's doing now: Show us, without words, that he can have a good time without us. I have to admit, Dom is probably the most suave person I know.

Tim appears to have forgotten Dom is here. She's staring attentively up at me as if we were on our first date. I'm beginning to think she's hitting on me.

Some girls play games. I know that. Sometimes they like to pit one friend against another to spark jealousy. But I get the impression that Tim is really serious, that I could nail her if I wanted to. I never would, of course, but she seems very willing...

We talk for an hour. Tim wants to know all about Lila, about my weight loss, and about Mary Ann, the girl who took my virginity. She presses me for every last detail: What position (her on top), was I able to hold out very long (about five minutes), did I ever sleep with her again (yes).

Her face goes serious as her eyes look down at the floor. "Interesting," she says, biting the inside of her bottom lip. Is she getting turned on?

Dom goes back to the bar. I haven't talked to him all night.

"So when do I get to meet Stephanie?"

"Whenever you want!"

"Let's have a double date!"

"If we do, just don't hug me like you did before."

She grins hugely, her eyes tipsy and glazed over. "You got a hard-on, didn't you? When I hugged you?"

Shit, that's embarrassing. But I recover quickly. "You see what you do to me?"

"Just WAIT until you see what I do to you," she coos. I am hard again. Yeah, she definitely wants to fuck me.

Dom comes back with the drinks. "Finally!" Tim says. "You took so long, Steve and I almost ran out to the car for a quickie!"

Dom and I laugh. "You two looked like you were having one on the bar stool already!" he says.

"I'm sorry babe, he's just too hot," Tim says, patting the inside of my thigh without looking, maybe two inches from paydirt. "We wanna have a double date!"

"Sure you can keep your hands off him?"

"Yeah, but not my feet," Tim says, winking.

Around 1:00, we go upstairs to listen to some music. Tim continues talking to me, though she has to shout in my ear to do it.

2:00. A slow song comes on--the DJ's subtle way of telling us to get the hell out.

"Dance with me," Tim says.

"Tim, you're here with Dom--"

"It's fine," she says, staring at me with her big blue eyes.

No way I can say no to that.