Wednesday, April 06, 2005

Our new couple coupling friends

I lived in a dorm for two years in college. I also lived in a one-bedroom apartment, and in a fraternity house. With the exception of the latter, sleeping quarters were extremely cramped, and I spent more than a few awkward, sleepless hours trying not to make too much noise as a roommate pounded away at some writhing, moaning teenage co-ed.

I'm not going to lie to you: It was very hard knowing that I couldn't get laid, and hearing my roommate stick it to someone 10 feet away. It just reminded me how pathetic my situation truly was at the time.

Nowadays, when I'm in the same room with a couple who is fucking, I almost always end up following suit with whomever happens to be next to me. I love the idea of two couples going at it at the same time; call it "sin synergy".

It feels very awkward listening to Brian and Susan having sex. On the one hand, this is their room and it's certainly within their rights to pork each other's brains out. On the other, why offer to let us stay? I was all set to get a room for Steph and me, and they insisted that we stay with them. And now this? I'm actually kind of angry.

"Don't stop," Susan says, in a barely-audible whisper. I don't look directly, but I can see movement to my left, and I hear the soft whisper of bodies against sheets.

Maybe this was intentional. Maybe they WANTED us to come up here, wanted us to hear them fucking, wanted us to get off on it, and maybe even join them.

Doubt it. If they were true swingers, they probably would have propositioned us a lot earlier than this, instead of waiting for us to go to sleep. It seems to me that they just got horny, and they're hoping that we won't hear.

"Ughhh..." Susan moans, gutturally. The activity becomes more feverish. I can't NOT look anymore; I turn my head just slightly to the left and focus on them as my eyes adjust to the dark.

Her knees are in the air, poking up from under the white sheets like two snow-capped mountains. Brian's ass rises and falls rhythmically atop her. His movements are big and exaggerated, as if he's fucking her with a baseball bat-sized dick. He must be hung pretty well.

"Ah, shit-" Brian moans. I hear the slapping of flesh against flesh and the frantic rustling of sheets as their sex builds to a crescendo.

I reach down and grab my cock. It's hard and throbbing. I actually consider waking Steph up and letting her hear them. I wouldn't even ask her to have sex; I would just let her hear them, then let nature take its course. But a deal is a deal, and I really think abstinence will help us. Maybe I'll be able to just go to sleep.

"Don't stop! That feels SO good!" Susan moans under her breath. The bed springs squeak subtlely in rhythm with Brian's thrusts.

He stops. "Ugh. UGGGGGHHHHHH!" He moans, collapsing onto her. I can see her legs crossed around his back under the sheets.


Sunday, March 13, 8:30am

My eyes open. I turn to my left. Brian and Susan are wide awake, beaming as they flip through TV channels.

"Hey, sleepyhead!" Susan says. "You guys LOVE to sleep, don't you?"

Yeah, and you guys love to FUCK. With an audience!

"How long have you been up?" I ask.

She looks at Brian. "Hour and a half?" He nods. "We went down and worked out already. Is Steph awake?"

"Mmmmmmm," says Steph. We all laugh.

"You guys want breakfast? We're gonna do room service! It's my treat!"

"No way, man. You let us use your room. I'm not letting you treat us."

"Steve, I saw the tab for the drinks that you paid for. We're TREATING you!"

Why not? It was over $100, after all. "Steph, you hear that?" I say.

This hotel definitely gets breakfast right. My eggs are light and fluffy; the bacon lean and crispy, and the OJ smooth and tart.

From the corner of my eye, I see Brian and Susan whispering to each other and looking uneasily up at us. I wonder if they figured out that I was awake, and are going to apologize.

"Would you guys like to go out this weekend?" Susan says.

"Sure," says Steph, looking at me. I lock eyes with her, flashing a little grimace. "I mean, if you're free, Steve."

"I might have something going on."

"Gimme a call in a couple of days," Brian says, handing me a business card. I give him mine.

10:20am. The parking lot is finally clear, and Steph and I are on our way home.

"Do you know what I heard last night?" I say.

"I know. I heard it too," she says.