Thursday, July 01, 2004

Vicky's indecent proposal

As soon as I got to the hotel on Sunday, I called Victoria. She was still a half hour away, but said she'd be there as soon as she could.

I've known Vicky for about 2 years. She's been dating the same guy, Mike, that whole time. He seems nice enough: He's a dentist, and he travels a lot doing continuing education classes and student seminars. But Vicky seems melancholy and depressed most of the time. When she gets tipsy, she tends to go off about him, saying that he's never around, and that she is bored.

Late last year, he asked her to marry him and she accepted. She called me crying to tell me about it. I don't think they were tears of joy. So why the fuck is she marrying him??

The first time I hooked up with Vicky was Valentine's Day, last year. Vicky is a sales rep for one of our vendors, and we were working on our forecast for the upcoming several months, and negotiating prices. Take a picture of this....

We are sitting in my office, at the corner of my desk. She is wearing open-toed shoes. She has these really sinewy, strong-looking feet. Does that sound silly?

She's got an amazing tan. And deep red lipstick. She smells like....coconuts. Some kind of body wash, I am guessing. She's making me crave Pina Coladas.

Her legs are crossed, and her foot keeps brushing against me. "Sorry," she'll say, and smile. Sorry my ass!!

We finish around 7:00. I have a date with someone else, but I have a feeling about Vicky, so I surreptitiously call my date and cancel. We go to dinner, and talk all night long about movies, plays, TV, and so on.

I drive her back to her hotel and she invites me to have a drink with her at the bar. It's 10:30.

We drink for hours and talk the night away. She is starting to stare at me "that way".

WTF! Let me go for the hard close. Why not?

"Let's go upstairs," I say.

She grabs her purse and doesn't say a word.

It wasn't good the first time. I was drunk and tired. Yeah, I finished the job, but there was no sense of urgency. So now I had a point to make.

The next time she came out, I made sure I was ready. I brought her to my place and made her dinner (Fetuccine Alfredo - it sucked) and then fucked her three times straight. She went to the bathroom after the third time and said, "You made me BLEED!!"

Uh, thanks, honey.

So we've been off and on ever since. Every once in a while, we are in the same town, and we always hook up when we are.

Vicky pulls up in her car and greets me with a big smile. "Hey lover!" she says. She always calls me that. Accurate, I guess.

"I have something for you," she says.

"What's that?"

"Let's go inside!"

So we enter the room, and she pulls out a plastic bag. There is a box of frozen popsicles inside.

HUH? What are these for?


"It's been a loooooong time," she says. "TOO long." She kisses me. Her lips taste sweet, like she's been eating candy. Her tongue slides out and rubs mine, smooth and silky.

She sits on the bed and leans back. I pull her skirt up. NO underwear. How unsanitary! ;-). I start to lick her.

There is a right way and a wrong way to do this, guys. Your tongue has to be broad and flat. Imagine you are licking an ice cream cone. Or painting a fence. Whenever I watch porn movies the guys are always shooting their tongues out, lizard-like. That doesn't work for me. I might stick my tongue inside every once in a while to see how she's doing in the wetness department, but otherwise, slow and steady wins the race. I don't get fancy at all, and I always get rave reviews. If you're doing it right, you don't have to ask...

So she is moaning and groaning, and I stick my tongue inside her, and she is wet and gooey in there...she is ready, if she's ever going to be...

I reach for a popsicle and tear it open. Grape...I lick it just a bit. Then I slip it inside her. She recoils. "Unghhhhhhh!" she says.

She starts to grind her hips forward and back. She's FUCKING the popsicle! I pull it out. ALL the way out. Then back in. It's melting like crazy. I start licking her again. There is slimy grape juice everywhere. It's not bad, but let's just say it wouldn't make a very good Life Saver flavor. "Grape Vagina" just doesn't have a nice ring to it.

"Do you want me?" I say. Let's see if I can tease this girl a little.

"FUCK me right now. Oh my god. PLEASE fuck me!" she says. It looks like she is going to come, whether I stick it in or not. I toss the popsicle aside, and I'm fumbling around with my condom, and finally get it on, and no sooner do I penetrate....

"OH GOOOOOOOOOD!!!" she says. "Oh God you are SOOO good!"

Um, thanks, but I've been inside you for like, 10 seconds, tops...

I can still feel the coldness of the popsicle. I like it! I look down and she is dribbling and oozing everywhere. Yeah, part of it is the popsicle, but Vicky "gushes" sometimes, when she is really horny. I look at her, and there are tears in her eyes. Reminds me of when I watched "Field of Dreams"!

So I start pumping away at her, figuring she's going to tell me to stop any time now. It is so incredibly wet and slippery inside her now; it's like fucking an oil slick. I look down and watch it sliding in and out of her and I am totally gone. I explode with orgasm. I can feel all the stress leaving my's the way you feel after a strenuous workout.

We lay there on the bed afterwards, me on my back, she propped up on her elbow, twirling my hair with her finger. Her brown eyes are gorgeous. She really is a pretty girl.

"Let's do something crazy," she says.

"We just did."

"No, something we've never done before."

"Such as?"

"Take another week off and come to Catalina with me."


"Yeah, it's an island..."

"I know, I know. Vicky, it's way too crazy."

There is NO fucking way I am going away with this girl for a week. I wouldn't go away with ANY girl for that long. Well, maybe Lila, but just maybe. And certainly no one just feels too....domesticated for me. It gives me the creeps. Yuck!

"It IS crazy. That's why we have to do it!" She says.

"No. Go with your fiance."

She rolls her eyes. "Oh yeah, Mr. I'm-too-tired-to-fuck," she says. "That'll be fun."

She is pissed. She starts getting dressed. "I think we need to figure out just what we're doing here," she says.

Oh, shit. Here we go.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, I'm getting married in November."


"Are we gonna keep this going, are we gonna stop, what?"

"I didn't have a problem with things the way they were!"

"Well, me neither!"

"So, what's the problem?"

Shit, I'm still naked. There is something demoralizing about arguing with no clothes on. I start pulling on my boxers.

"Nothing," she says. But she's still pissed, I can tell.

Vicky is a little high-maintenance anyway. If this is the end of the road for us, so be it...

But I liked that popsicle thing......